We had to say goodbye to our sweet little Mabel. She warmed everyone’s heart and was always happy and just looking into her eyes was like looking into the soul of a person. She was with me anytime I was teaching online, students tell me they miss her gentle snores that were so comforting.
It was a hard thing to have her die in my arms, but I would rather have her with us than somewhere cold and alone. The day before she went into my Yoga room, she had never gone in there with herself before, only if I was in there. I knew then that she would succumb to the tumor that was diagnosed 9 months prior. I had to make a CHOICE right then, was I willing to let her go? She has always spoken volumes to me so it was up to me to listen. She went downhill quickly, I held her and spoke in her ears that it was “ok to go, she did not have to stay with us anymore.” I had to LET GO no matter how freaking hard it was. This is the circle of life, we must all go, how we choose to let our loved ones go is up to us. Is it painful, hell yeah, that pain will be there for a long time, but how I suffer, that is my choice. I can choose to look at all the love she brought us and that I chose to let her go, so that she did not hang on for us.
The Sutras teaches us about pain and suffering, choice and letting go. I have to lean on those teachings now as I move through this next chapter in my life. I remember saying goodbye to my Dad, an entirely different story, so much chaos, pain and no choice. I have come a long way… I do not fear death, you must make your own choices about that. I told her she did not have to fight anymore, that we loved her and she could leave, she had friends on the other side waiting for her. Do not fear death, as it often frees us from pain on Earth. Choice. Do not let others stay for YOUR benefit, let them go when they are ready, tell them it’s ok, no matter how freaking hard it is. Choice, not the one I wanted, but it was a CHOICE.
Thank you as always for providing the space for my thoughts and for always holding space for me and my life as I navigate my world and my yoga teachings. These teachings have given my mind somewhere to go as I move through grief and I thank YOU, my students for that opportunity.☺️
Be well. Be Safe.
Love. Light.
JennyO
Corazón Yoga 